I had sworn not so long ago,
That I wouldn't ever walk through these screaming streets again,
That I wouldn't ever let the rain align with the burdens of my heart,
Yet here I am,
Walking through these paths,
Watching the gods look at me with their hearts in their hands,
I'm not walking tall anymore,
For I am walking through shame.
It was only a few days ago,
I could hear the soft sound of your hands touching the guitar strings,
You would sing in my ears,
A goodbye that couldn't ever be more sweeter,
Or a promise as I saw it,
To be here,
To not leave in me amidst these lonely streets.
I sit here,
Your broken guitar in the corner,
Your words torn up and set on fire,
I never do things out of spite,
I never let anger become a fire within me,
The whiskey tastes like heaven,
The taste of your lips still left on mine,
Stings me as if though I had spent the entire night sipping misery from the devil's cup,
With all my heart,
With all of my broken parts that had just begun coming back to life,
I believed that you would be mine.
They say that once haunted,
There's no going back,
For those ghosts become your friends,
Wherever you go,
They will follow.
I've packed boxes,
I've changed towns and cities,
I've deliberately left behind parts of your memory,
I left my ring on that one kitchen counter,
I left that letter in the trash,
I walked out of old homes thinking that this will be it,
My new beginning,
But even new cities feel like home to me,
Even new people spike my calm heart with the bitter taste of your memories.
Here I am,
In this big city,
Lying on my bed,
Wondering if you still loved me.
There are these silence drenched nights,
When I'm certain that my heart will get the best of me,
I look through drawers,
I look through my phone,
Only to find absolutely nothing that feels like you.
I thought that I wouldn't ever be here again ,
Walking through these screaming streets,
How could your love die on me?
Guess I'll just do what I do best,
Stop my glass from ever being empty,
And that's the one thing we have in common,
We bury ourselves in whiskey. -V